Taoist sexual alchemy as explained through use of an anime reference.

Notice: This article contains mature content. It is peppered with references to pee-pees and yum-yums. You done been disclaimered.

Back!
I know it probably looked like The Angel of Death had paid me a visit on account of my last piece. But no. For reasons that are boring and irrelevant (mostly related to Saturn transitioning my First House,) I had to take a teensy hiatus there. But we're hoping that's all behind us, and I should be back up here on my soap box to spew my madness to anyone who'll stop and listen at least once or twice a month.

So, let's talk about sex and anime. Don't worry, I'll cycle back around to astrology somehow.

Sexuality and Super Moves


Yu Yu Hakusho is a Shounen series about a group of four super-powered individuals who investigate spiritual imbalances in the living world on behalf of The Spirit Realm (the land of the dead. A mix between Heaven and Hades, essentially.) Like all other Shounen anime, however, it ends up being an excuse to see our young adventurers battle other groups of super-powered individuals, which inevitably leads to a story arc involving a martial arts tournament.

It is in this tournament arc that we focus, and on one character in particular: the diminutive, brooding anti-hero named Hiei. But first, a rundown on the general theory of Taoist sexual alchemy.

*WARNING: These practices can be dangerous if you do them improperly. Please don't mistake any of the following for instruction. I'll recommend some good books on the subject later for anyone interested in learning more.



If you've any familiarity with Tai Chi or Yoga, you've probably heard of the theoretical property known as chi, ki, or prana. Whatever name you give it (we'll stick with "chi" for the duration,) it is a raw source of bio-electric energy that exists in every living thing. It is within us from birth, and is also drawn from natural sources like breath, food, and sleep. Meditative practices such as those listed above can increase both the amount of chi in the body and the quality of chi flow in the body, as emotional or physical trauma, among other factors, can stagnate the chi.

Physical and mental exertion are two factors that can deplete chi. So is loss of blood, as in menstruation. So is ejaculation.

Taoist sexuality, therefore, aims to conserve energy by eliminating the need to ejaculate. "Fuck that!" some of you may be saying. Well, hang on a sec. You still have orgasms, you just learn to separate orgasm from ejaculation. See, when you stimulate an area of the body, such as the genitals, a lot of blood and chi is accumulated in that spot. Most Taoist sexual practices include the method of drawing this chi from the genitals, up the spine, up into the crown point on the top of your head. And it feels fantastic.

When you've had your fun, it's usually a good idea to allow the chi to flow down the front of your body into the dan tien (a couple inches below the navel,) where it can be stored.



Dedication to this practice can allow a man to have orgasms that last minutes, even hours, which is a lot more hang time and a lot less clean up than doing it the old-fashioned way. And also, sipping this energy up the spine and through the proper channels leads to a more harmonious flow of chi. It's like Tai Chi for your penis! (or vagina.)

With this in mind, we turn back to Hiei.

I named mine "Fiery Death Dragon."

Hiei is a demon who fights on the side of the angels. This is out of respect for Yuusuke, the protagonist, who beat him soundly in one of the earliest fights in the series. Being a fire demon, the culmination of Hiei's power is the ability to use the Ensatsu Kokuryu Ha ("Fiery Murderous Black Dragon Wave,") wherein he summons up a draconian apparition composed entirely from hellfire. The dragon is sealed inside of a black tattoo which runs up Hiei's right arm, and it is from there that it is conjured.


The wind-up...

...and the pitch!

As one might expect, the goal of this technique is to reduce the target to cinders, which is exactly what Hiei does the first time he uses it. He also ends up with horrible burns on the entirety of his right arm. Clearly, damaging oneself in a fight is less than ideal. So he decides not to use the technique until he can control it, and goes off to train and train and train.

So it goes with run of the mill male sexuality. The ability to produce and expel sperm is a powerful talent! But it comes at the cost of a large depletion of chi, which is the reason many guys pass out shortly after blowing a load. We need to recover from self-inflicted damage.

The results of Hiei's training are evident in the decisive final battle of the tournament. He is forced to play his trump card once again, but this time, he sustains no damage, and the technique is exponentially more powerful - so much so that random, low-level demons, spectators to the dark proceedings, burst into flames and die without even coming near the fearsome projectile.

But Hiei's opponent, Bui, is not only able to sustain a direct hit from the dragon, but is able to turn it around and throw it back at Hiei. It looks as though Hiei will be destroyed by his own weapon, but of course, he isn't. In fact, having the dragon turned back on him was what he had trained for, what he was waiting for. It turns out that when the caster sucks back in his own Kokuryuha, it acts as a powerful "drug" which temporarily jacks up their speed and strength. With this, he easily outmaneuvers and overpowers Bui, winning the match handily.

It turns out that a side-effect of gaining this power is that Hiei needs to rest and sleep to recuperate from the use of the dragon. So it is here that any similarity with Taoist sexual practice ends; if a man were to retain his semen and store the resultant chi, he would not need to pass out after, and may even feel wired from the collected energy in the crown point.


Was it good for you?

But aside from this difference, what Hiei did in that match is akin to what Taoist sexual practices attempt to do. Rather than fire our supermove off with reckless abandon, it's better to turn it inward and self-fertilize. I realize that sounds a little gross. The added stamina and lifespan, however, are not.

Let's talk about Uranus and The Moon.

Powerful Foundations

Uranus is a very Yang/male energy, one which is known to shatter structures for the purpose of change. For this reason, it has been associated with revolution and new, daring ideas. Ingenious breakthroughs. It is also associated with sperm, which causes a drastic change in the structure of the ovum - it makes it into a baby.

The Moon is the light which represents foundations, both physical and emotional. It is archetypal Yin/feminine, passive and motherly. Not very pro-active, you'll usually see a person's Venus or Mars acting for the benefit of The Moon. It is meant to support, and to be a fertile ground for vitality within the body.

I have observed some very negative effects when Uranus transits The Moon. Many people don't have very malleable physical or emotional foundations, and are unwilling to accept the changes that Uranus wants to bring about. This can cause a person to be exposed to an idea that shakes them to the core, wherein they either have to change how they feel or live a lie. Or it can be something as blunt as a near-death experience, wherein actual physical harm is inflicted.

This is not without mythological basis. We can see typical patterns of the Moon-Uranus relationship in the Greek creation myth. Wikipedia sez: "In the Olympian creation myth...Uranus came every single night to cover the earth and mate with Gaia, but he hated the children she bore him...Uranus imprisoned Gaia's youngest children in Tartarus, deep within Earth, where they caused pain to Gaia." Uranus' demands can cause discomfort and pain to The Moon, as he is as emotionally distant to that which he bears as she is protective and nurturing.

The sperm-ovum idea is a beneficial outcome of the Uranus-Moon relationship. So is sexual alchemy.

The sperm (Uranian energy) is anchored to the body (Moon.) Uncomfortable staying in one spot when excited, it tries to burst free. The body, sensing that it would be pleasurable to expel the sperm, willingly complies. The result is not really that great for either, though. The Moon becomes less fertile, and Uranus ends up on the business end of a gym sock.

Unless! If Uranus is worked with, harnessed, controlled, then it can be directed into the very soil where it originated. The Moon increases in fecundity, which translates into a higher sense of well-being for the man, and in many cases, a greater emotional stability.

It's at this point that I psychically sense a collective impatience in my female readers. Don't worry, gals. The sexual energy collected in your sacred hoo-ha can serve the same Uranian purpose if circulated up the spine and to the crown. And you don't have to worry about any loss of chi though ejaculation...unless you're a squirter, and even then, I'm not sure how much chi you'd lose. Maybe some of you girls would like to join me to study this? I've moved out of my parents house, and I have manga and Dr. Pepper. Rrrow. (Just kidding, I don't drink Dr. Pepper.)

The ladies do lose a lot of chi once a month to Aunt Flo, but I have read about Taoist practices which supposedly turn off that faucet, thereby keeping the chi all stored up.

Also ladies, I should add that these techniques exist for your pleasure. A man who has practiced sexual Kung Fu will last way longer in the sack, will be more attentive and patient, and will likely seek out a higher state of ecstasy through emotional connection with you, his lover. And because the goal is to eliminate ejaculation, they run less of a risk of impregnating you...unless you're trying to get preggers, in which case, they'll be the drone who has super sperm, to make a strong and healthy baby. Lastly, a guy who practices Taoist sexual alchemy will be much less likely to spunk on your stomach.

If you'd like to learn more about the individual components of the preceding insanity melange, then please look to the links provided below:

Mantak Chia's "The Multi-Orgasmic Man" on Amazon.com.
Mantak Chia's "The Multi-Orgasmic Woman" on Amazon.com.
Books by Stephen T. Chang. ("The Tao of Sexology" is probably one of the best books on the subject.)
The Deer Exercise for Men.
The Moon & Uranus.
Yoshihiro Togashi.

Until next time!

A Scorpionic Notion

I was all set to write something about Batman, when suddenly...

Last weekend, I was struck with a particularly Scorpionic notion.

I'm very particular about naming it a simple notion, as I don't have the magical instruction to construct a theory on this matter. But maybe, just maybe, this will set off a light bulb in someone that is better trained in Golden Dawn or Enochian magic or what have you. Or, more likely, this notion has already been notioned up by someone long ago in a faraway land, and that fleshed-out theory is already in existence.

Nevertheless! I will expound with abandon, and through a tag-team use of two particularly nerdy mediums: Comic Books and Foreign Film.

Mercury's still in Scorpio. So let's talk of death, the force which ferries us past the veil of this world. Scorpio's rulership is split between Mars, the planet of war, and Pluto, the planetoid connected to death and the deep subconscious. It is from the latter rulership that Scorpio becomes the sign best suited for dealing with death. Both in accepting it when it comes and in doing whatever it can to preserve life.

Once again, it is to the latter that we turn our attention: the preservation of incarnation. There are all sorts of myths and folklores around alchemists and magicians, who have tried to cheat death through potions or golden elixers, or the legendary "Philosopher's Stone," popularized recently in the Harry Potter novels and in Fullmetal Alchemist. We also have vampires and other monstrous entities, which embrace a half-death in exchange for eternal life.

But what if everyone's making it more complicated than need be?

What if the key to "beating death" is simply to tell it to fuck off?

Bear with me here...

Who canonized this guy?!

Most people view death as a pretty brutal, gruesome ordeal. Its manifestation in most media is characterized accordingly. In the old days, we had a black-clad, hooded skeleton wielding a Saturnine scythe. Or sometimes, a grim angel carrying a fiery sword - though this is usually reserved for large-scale, Biblical smiting. In any event, everyone fears a visit from the reaper, as they know it'll be the last person they ever meet.

In the world of Garth Ennis' Preacher, the spectre of death is known as The Saint of Killers, a sallow giant who looks and talks more than a bit like Clint Eastwood's famous "Man With no Name," from the trio of Sergio Leone's Spaghetti Westerns. No scythe or sword for this otherwordly representative - having taken the position from the previous Angel of Death, The Saint had his flaming sword melted down and recrafted into twin six-shooters. When the hammers come down, the sound is enough to drown out thunder, and the rounds are powerful enough to pierce the armor of a tank.

Just like death, The Saint cannot be stopped; any conventional weapons simply brush off his thick hide. At more than one point in the series, an entire army stands between him and the man he is supposed to kill. A little less subtle than the normal Scorpio MO, The Saint merely chooses to plow through everyone in his path, killing all for the sake of eliminating his target. A hydrogen bomb is dropped on him about midway through the series' run - he stands unscathed amid the atomic fire, spits once, and says, "Not enough gun."

The series' protagonist, Jesse Custer, is the man who The Saint is trying to spring from this mortal coil. And he would have succeeded if it weren't for Custer's gift: in the first issue, he is granted the "voice of God," which means that if he speaks, any servant of the Almighty must obey. (Don't ask how he gets these powers. Just do yourself a favor, go support your local comic store by purchasing every single trade paper back in this series. It's fucking brilliant. Don't go to a chain bookstore, either. Be good. Support your local comic shops.)

Anyway, in the first arc of the story, The Saint has been unleashed on a mission to hunt down and kill Jesse Custer. When he finally catches up with him, the tense moment is met with an anti-climactic conclusion. As The Saint goes for his pistol, Jesse merely yells, "Back in the holster, fucker!" The Saint goes wide-eyed at the realization that he must obey. "Oh yeah. You heard." He stares daggers into Custer, tells him he's going to kill him, but ultimately is forced to retreat for the time being.

The Saint comes back eventually, but if Jesse tells him to jump, he simply has to. It's a matter of hierarchy.


A cheerful goth? No one'll believe that.

On the other side of the spectrum, we've got Neil Gaiman's Death, the second eldest of the seven Endless, beings that transcend the gods of the pantheistic traditions, and which have existed for all time. Death is the older sister of Dream, the focus and titular character of The Sandman.

Unlike The Saint, Death doesn't hunt anyone down. She doesn't even carry any sort of a weapon. She is represented as a kind and bright young woman, who greets the souls of the departed to ferry them beyond. She is pale, wears dark clothing, and carries a silver ankh on a chain around her neck. But, for being a personification of death, she is unwontedly full of spirit!

I have read somewhere that the idea behind this character was that you'd likely want someone like her to be waiting for you after the trauma of dying, and to guide you through the transition to whatever's next. I'll buy that, personally. I'd rather have a little sweetheart hold my hand than get skullfucked by...well, a skeleton.

Now, for as lovely a guide as Death is, she is still quite firm when it comes to performance of her duty. Whenever any of her "victims" cry out in protest that they just wanted a little more time, she tells them simply, "You had as much time as anyone else. You got a lifetime."

But in the world of The Sandman, there are three seperate incidents where Death did not ferry her intended guests. Or at least, three occassions where individuals were granted an extended stay.

There is a chapter in "Seasons of Mist" that focuses on a friendship between Edwin, the ghost of an English school boy who was murdered in 1916, and Rowland, a boy attending the same school in 1990. At the same time, Hell is closed for business by Lucifer, who is sick of ruling it. The result is, among other things, a lot of supernatural chaos on earth, including a mass malefic haunting of that very school. In the ensuing chaos, Rowland is killed despite Edwin's best efforts to keep him from harm. Now both boys are ghosts. When Death arrives to ferry them away, Rowland flatly refuses to go. Annoyed by this, she tells them she doesn't have time to deal with them right now, but she'll be back after she rounds up all the refugees from Hell. Thus, the boys cling to existence, non-corporel though it may be. They eventually get their own spin-off series, solving supernatural mysteries as The Dead Boy Detectives.

In this instance, Death is openly defied. The other two occurences involve a bargain. Torn from Greek myth, there is the story of Orpheus, who is Death's niece (Dream's son.) Against his father's wishes, he wishes to journey into Hades to retrieve his lost wife, Eurydice. In order to do so, he visits Death, who tells him that she will be able to grant his request, but that this will make him immortal, as only the ded or deathless can enter Hades. And though tragedy follows, the request is granted, and Orpheus becomes immune to Death for many centuries to come. He is only finally able to fully die when he begs his Endless father to help him do so.

Lastly, we have Hob Gadling. Hob is first seen as soldier of fortune in 1389 A.D., arguing with friends on the subject of death. In summation, his position is that he wants no part of death, and that the only reason anyone ever dies is because everyone else does it. It's a "mug's game," he says, a trendy thing to do. This catches the attention of Death and Dream, who happen to be enjoying a day in the mortal world. While not openly exposing their divinity, Death promises him that if he truly wants to be out of the loop, then that's how it will be. Dream promises to meet him in the same tavern in 100 years' time, and Hob gladly agrees. They continue the tradition of meeting every century, where Dream continues to offer him the prospect of death should he wish it. And though Hob is met with exponentially greater suffering and heartache than most men must endure, simply by the act of continuing to live (thereby outliving all loved ones, for starters,) he never takes the Endless up on their offer to die. He clings to life for as long as he can, no matter how difficult it gets.

The Swedes throw in.

More recently, I had the pleasure of viewing Ingmar Bergman's classic existentialist film, The Seventh Seal. Here, a knight has returned from The Crusades, only to find his home ravaged by plague. He has come from a place of slaughter into a land of pestilence - death has been by his side all along. At the beginning of the film, Death comes to him, pale and cloaked, and tells him it is his time. The knight delays his demise by challenging the spectre to a game of chess, which prolongs his lifespan at least until the conclusion of their match. This game is played throughout the remainder of the film. You have probably seen this parodied in Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey.

The knight desperately tries to fend off death until he can get an answer to his big questions: what lies beyond? Is there really a God? A Heaven? He is unwilling to go until he is sure there will be something waiting for him.

Seeing this film is really what got me thinking about this subject. This is the only example I've given where Death is represented as a being over which a mortal has absolutely no power. Why? Because it was written by existentialists. Existentialists do not recognize anything beyond the experiential, therefore, generally rule out any sort of higher power of any kind. When the knight tries to pump Death for information, asking him to reveal his secrets, Death says, "I have no secrets." Translation? When you die, you go in the ground and rot.

I, for one, am critical of this cynical worldview. Moreover, I find it limiting. Cutting oneself off from the prospect of the divine means cutting oneself off from power. To me, means throwing in the towel and giving up on life. And at the end of this film, that's just what happens. They all just give up and go with death because he says so.


Go away. I'm busy living.

If you're still with me, then thanks for your patience. Here's where my notion comes in, as well as the vague connection to Hermetic tradition.

In any grimoire that I've ever seen, in my very limited understanding of goetic conjuration and angelic magic, the basis of even being able to do such a thing lies in authority. In short, man has authority of both angels and demons. The Bible says so, too. That's why Jesus and his apostles can exorcise demons from the possessed, the reason that Legion was cast into the sea.

In all given examples, death is personified. In Preacher, The Saint of Killers is the new angel of death. Gaiman's Death is portrayed as being above any sort of deity, but there are cited examples wherein she cannot take someone (at least temporarily) because they do not wish to be taken. And though he is more nebulously portrayed in The Seventh Seal, Death can still be delayed upon request - who is to say that the knight couldn't have told him to piss off altogether?

Basically, I propose that we, as human beings, should hold some authority over this force of nature. If death is an angel, we should be able to tell him, "No. Don't feel like dying today." And he should have to listen. That's the way it's laid out.

I'm not saying that it's possible to escape death entirely - someday, after all, the sun will explode and that will be that.

But even when our bodies are no longer suitable to support life, I believe that we still don't have to go if we don't want to. Why else would there be so many ghost stories? I think ghosts are just people that didn't want to go, like the Dead Boy Detectives. They're dead, but clinging to whatever piece of the manifest they can hold onto. Kind of like a vampire. Kind of like a Scorpio.

"If this is all true," you may ask yourself, "then why doesn't everyone deny death?" Well, a lot of people don't think they can. A lot of people just assume it's their time. Or hell, maybe they're right to do so - after all, continuing to live can be a horrible thing. Not to be too unpleasant, but I have seen eldery relatives beg for death. Their bodies are shot, their friends are all dead, and their minds are starting to go. What's more, they may consider themselves a burden on their families. It makes more sense to go hang with the pretty goth girl than to mope around this dump and suffer more.

All I'm saying is that if you don't want your ticket punched, and you're truly down for more life, then by all accounts, and for as near as I can figure, you should be able to tell Death to come back and ask you again in 100 years time.

That's my notion. It makes sense to me, even if I don't have the magical language to back it.

It's a mug's game, man.

SCORPLOITATION CINEMA

Nerdcore Astrotypes:

Scorploitation Cinema – Female Prisoner 701: Scorpion

Our culture is saturated with stories of Mars archetypes. Mars is, of course, the planet of war, and his influence is seen in all stories of great heroism and courage. These are often made manifest by Mars' fiery side, Aries, in stories where a young man seeks to prove himself, gain power, save the day, and get the girl.

But there's another side to Mars. Mars is not only the ruling planet of proud Aries, but of under-handed, intense, mysterious Scorpio. And while the Scorpio archetype may not seem as overtly valorous as the Aries stories, their tales always involve a figure who is willing to endure great hardships for what they perceive to be a noble goal. And since Scorpio is a water sign, one intimately tied to emotion, that goal may involve the destruction of those that have caused the Scorpio pain.

Sasori Onna

1972 saw the birth of a Japanese cult classic, Joshuu 701-Gou: Sasori.

Literal translation? Female Prisoner 701: Scorpion. And it's not just a clever title; this is a straight-up Scorpio story of love, sex, betrayal, and death. It's also a women-in-prison flick, and that's pretty hot in a trashy way. Trashy-hot is another great staple of the Scorpio archetype.

Following a failed prison break, our protagonist, the lovely Nami Matsushima (played by Meiko Kaji, and known among the other prisoners only as "Matsu,") lies face-down and hog-tied in solitary confinement. The prisoner who is assigned to issue her daily meals happens to be an enemy of hers, and is using her influence to kick Matsu while she's down. She taunts her, beats her, encourages her to eat the food off the floor like the dog that she is. All the while, Matsu remains silent and solemn, an icy glare as her only response.

The woman says that she thinks Matsu "must be very cold" from having to lie on the floor all day. She covers her in a wet, freezing blanket. This finally gets a reaction out of Matsu: a knowing smile. A smile that knows it will have its revenge.

Sure enough, the next time the woman comes to torture her, things go down quite differently. The woman begins "feeding" Matsu, pouring scalding-hot Miso soup on her back, ladling it on in measured, sadistic spoonfuls. Matsu doesn't let even a whimper escape her lips, but endures the pain until her tormentor is standing directly on the very same wet blanket, which has been covering her since the previous day. When the time is right, she jerks her body, and shifts the blanket out from under the woman's feet. This sends her reeling backwards to the floor, the boiling pot of Miso spilling all over her face and torso.

Cancer, which is Cardinal Water, sticks very close to the emotional source. Like the crab of its namesake, it lives right by the water. It protects what it loves by building up defenses, and by obscuring it from view. But scorpions don't live anywhere near the water. They live in the desert, where survival is much more difficult. Scorpio, then, is carrying the same water - the same devotion to a love - through a harsh, unforgiving terrain. And living in that world means protecting the water by any means.

A scorpion will hide, lying in wait for just the right time to poison its prey. Stealth and poison are contrary to what most perceive as honorable combat. But if the scorpion doesn't resort to these methods, it will die. Likewise, if Matsu hadn't taken her one chance to lash out, she might have been tortured to death. And whether she has to endure a burn, a kick, a scratch, a bite, or merely the monotony of a long-term prison sentence, Matsu will wait for the perfect time to carry out her work.

It is worth noting at this point that the word "matsu" can literally mean "to wait." While we're at it, it is worth noting that "Nami," her given name, can mean "wave." "Waiting Wave," eh? Sounds kind of like Fixed Water to me.

Virtue Behind the Venom

From here, we get some flashback exposition: Matsu is in prison for attempted murder. The man she tried to murder was her lover, the villainous police detective Sugimi. Having seduced Matsu, he used her as bait in a sting operation, letting her walk into a yakuza stronghold all alone, where she was raped and almost killed. Waiting for the gangsters to be occupied with Matsu, Sugimi then burst in and arrested them, adding rape to a charge of racketeering.

Unlucky/in love.

Of course, some of the yakuza's dirty money gets "lost" on the way to evidence. When Sugimi offers Matsu a fraction of the money as a reward for her role in the sting, she turns on him, and attempts to stab him on the street. This lands her in jail, where she vows to escape and take her revenge.

Scorpio represents water in its fixed state. It is goal-oriented emotional intelligence which that do whatever it must to get from Point A to Point B. Like a river, it will curve and wind around any obstacle, usually ignoring the direct approach in favor of subtlety. And although Matsu's infamy grows among the prisoners and the guards, no one can be sure that she has done anything at all. After all, how does a woman who has had all of her limbs bound manage to burn an inmate with Miso soup? More incidents follow, until her name is one that cannot be uttered without conveying the severity that her actions imply.

Like the scorpion of her namesake, everyone stays away from Matsu (except for her Piscean friend, Yuki, whose hazy identity is supplemented by her devoted compassion.) Also like the scorpion, everyone wants to crush her. This is the effect of terror, one of Scorpio's favorite weapons.

The other inmates not only fear her, they also hate her for evading retribution, and look for any chance to take her down a peg. The warden knows she has some connection to an incident which has caused him to be disfigured, and vows to break her. And Sugimi, fearing her eventual wrath, has commissioned an assassin within the prison walls to ensure that Matsu has an "accident" of her own.

Parasite Porno

In an effort to find out Matsu's true involvement in the various acts of havoc around the prison, the warden throws her into solitary confinement once again. But when Matsu looks around the cell, she finds that she is not alone - another inmate sits at the other side of the room. Although it remains unrevealed at this time, the woman is actually an undercover police operative who has been sent to pump her for information.

The pretty young officer, under the guise of being a fellow inmate, attempts to question Matsu on the nature of her infamy and involvement in the recent unrest. Matsu sees through her ruse easily, coolly stating, "You talk too much." That's when the fan service begins.

Good, that's good. Now smell her a little.

Matsu begins to tenderly, but relentlessly, seduce the young woman. Even when the woman pushes her away, telling her to stop, Matsu continues to caress and undress her. Soon, the woman's pleas fade, replaced by moans of pleasure. Hot, right?

Sort of. But what follows isn't really the saxophone-and-light-jazz sort of lesbian scene we've come to expect from women in prison flicks. It looks more like something you'd see on the highlights from The Discovery Channel - Matsu isn't just sexing this girl up, she's consuming her.

Venus, the planet of love, is not very happy in Scorpio, where it is in one of its two detrimental positions. It doesn't understand Venusian subtlety. So when a Scorpio makes love, it can look like an act of consumption in the wild. Which, if you're into that, is pretty cool. And since Scorpio is ruled by Mars, it is no surprise that Matsu is less interested in gettin' her fingers into this chick's honeypot, and more interested in the inherent tactical advantages.

When the young officer reports back to the warden, she comes empty-handed, having obtained no useful information. He thanks her for her bravery and service, and tells her she is dismissed. But she protests, begging hysterically to be put back into prison, claiming that Matsu is close to cracking. Seeing things for what they are, the warden rips her shirt open, revealing a shotgun pattern of hickeys and bite marks. As she is dragged from the room, the young woman still begs to be put back into confinement with Matsu.

Hot Scorpio Lovin'.

Scorpio is associated with vampirism. Since Scorpio is a creature which is associated with the fixed exchange of energy, Scorpio sexuality may manifest in the form of tantric love. Here, the two partners give and take equally, truly sharing of each other's essence. Not so with the vampyiric Scorpio. They take everything, give nothing, sustaining themselves on their partner's energy while alternately putting them under a mysterious, sexy spell. In this scenario, Matsu has used her sexuality as a weapon, and the young police officer has fully succumbed to her influence. Tricked, trapped, hypnotized, and disgraced - this is just another way that the scorpion can sting.

La Mort dans La Maison de Dieu

Most everyone in the prison has grown to hate and resent Matsu for her actions. Sensing this, the warden constructs a crude plan to destroy her.

He has all the women led out to the yard, surrounded by armed guards, and instructs them to start digging. When they have dug to his satisfaction, he tells them to refill the holes. When the holes are filled, he has them dig again. And so on.

He says that this will continue until those responsible for his disfigurement come forward to accept punishment. No one does. When the group is told to stop and come inside for the night, Matsu is told that she must stay and continue alone. The other inmates refer to this as "The Devil's Punishment."

Eventually, the plan backfires: while women are fed up with taking abuse for Matsu's sake, they end up taking it out on the guards in a fit of rebellion. They rise up with their shovels, get ahold of a few guns, and capture a handful of guards, holing up in a nearby warehouse.

Mars is represented in the Tarot as The Tower, or The House of God. The card depicts a great fortification being shattered by a bolt of lightning, one that bears a striking resemblance to the tail on the Scorpio sigil. It signifies institutions - like this prison - whose use has been outlived or surpassed by the egos of those in charge. In other words, the institution is supposed to exist to serve the greater good, but the heads of the institution believe that they themselves are the greater good. And so, it must be destroyed so that the divinity it houses may be reallocated to a more appropriate place. Obviously, you don't want to be in the tower when this happens. Matsu, like that lightning bolt, has sent an ineffective institution crashing down, just by the nature of her existence.

Militant/feminine.

The uprising is eventually brought down, but not before many are killed – both inmates and guards. Among them is Yuki, Matsu's only friend, who fulfills her Pisces-as-martyr role by jumping in front of a series of bullets that are meant for Matsu. The one behind the trigger is the inmate who has been tapped by Sugimi to assassinate our Scorpionic protagonist. Needless to say, she is dealt with severely, and Matsu takes advantage of the abounding confusion to escape.

Death Wears a Pretty Hat

Scorpio is represented in the Tarot as Death. The card portrays a skeletal rider, clad in black armor, riding a pale horse, destroying all living things in its path. Kneeling before its grim countenance are a pleading holy man, a woman who has resigned herself to fate, and a child who stares on in wonder. Rich or poor, young or old, saint or sinner, no one escapes. The rider's forward march is absolute and unrelenting.

This is the very image that Matsu conjures as she stalks through the night-time streets of Tokyo, finally free. Clad fully and elegantly in black, only a glimpse of her pale face escapes from the wide brim of her hat. Apparently, Sugimi has enjoyed a number of business partnerships with the dirty money he has stolen. She tracks down each and everyone one of his partners, stealthily knifing them in crowded public settings. Before they can even cry out, before they finger her for their murder with a dying breath, it is too late; she has disappeared.

Why knives? Because a knife doesn't make any noise. A knife can be easily concealed. I've never been stabbed or shot, but it seems to me that the former would be more psychologically damaging, and that's how Scorpio likes it. A gun is Sagittarian; it can kill from across the room or from a hundred yards away. You have to be up close with a blade – it's a personal violation, and a parallel to the sharpened tail of the scorpion.

In the film's climax, Matsu has cornered Sugimi in an elevator, but hesitates in completing her vengeance. Perhaps she still has some feelings for him, or perhaps she falters because killing him is the only thing she has lived for. In any case, her hesitation costs her the element of surprise, which is key to the Scorpio's attack. A brief struggle and a roof-top chase ensue. Here, in the daylight, Matsu's black garb seems to stand out more – she is less threatening, more desperate. Like any dark mystery, she loses power when exposed. But not all of it.

This is why Batman sticks to dark alleys.

Scorpio won't just give up because its master plan has failed. It is a war sign, after all. When all of its tricks, poisons, and subterfuge have been stripped away, it'll just come at you. And that's what happens here, as Matsu rushes Sugimi, impaling him on the end of her blade. She stabs at him furiously until she is sure that he's dead.

The final reel of the film shows Matsu back in prison for murder, looking very pleased with herself.

A happy ending.

The theme song to this film is "Urami Bushi," loosely translated as "Revenge Blues." It was borrowed by Tarantino (who clearly drew inspiration from films like this) as a capper to his revenge epic "Kill Bill." A selected lyric...

"I cannot die before I fulfill my fate,
And so I live on, driven only by my hate,
A woman's life is a song,
A song of vengeance."

Boys, watch out for those Scorpio girls.

While we're at it...girls, you watch out for those Scorpio girls, too.

The trailer.

WARNING: boobies, butts, hyperviolence, lesbianism. You know, all the good stuff. ALSO WARNING: Trailer gives everything away. But if you've gotten this far, then it's already been spoiled, so you might as well..

Copyright Nerdcore Astrotypes, 2007

Zodiacal Correlations of Slutty Halloween Costumes

Okay, you got me: this is not exactly "on topic" as far as nerd fandom is concerned. But I'm making an exception for the best holiday ever.

Halloween is a magical day. Spawned from an amalgamation of Samhain, a Celtic celebration of the end of the harvest, and All Hallows' Eve, the evening before All Saint's Day in the Christian faith. For nerds, it is a time to rent trashy horror movies, cosplay, and eat candy corn. (But not Indian corn. You know, the one that's like candy corn, but they replace the yellow part with a gross brown stump? And it's supposed to be chocolate and actually just tastes like candied ass? That stuff is disgusting.)

It is also a time to oggle scantily clad women. Because when playing dress-up becomes socially acceptable, the inhibitions go flying! Well, my leetle nerdlings, here is a helpful guide to identifying the prevailing archetypes of your Halloween honey.

Ladies, if you're having trouble deciding what type of costume to don, please feel free to consult this menu of fleshy possibilities and compare it against your birth chart. I'm sure that whatever you choose, the effect will be lovely. But for optimal results, it might be good to plan around your Venus sign and your Rising sign.

So, without further ado, let's tart it up!

Aries: Dominatrix
Aries, with its Mars rulership, is a very male sign, even among the other fire and air signs. It is primarily concerned with conquering through force of will. When a woman self-identifies with the Aries archetype, that martial intent manifests through the oldest feminine weapon: sexuality. And that's how we get one half of the BSM fetish. Less involved with the process of orgasm, the dominatrix gets off, and gets others off, through the practice of subjugation. So if you see any leather-clad, whip-toting wimmens around your Halloween party, they just might be an Aries. So go pick a fight if you're into that sort of thing.

We also would have accepted: Slutty Army Girl, Slutty Barbarian Chick

Taurus: Prostitute
Taurus isn't really known for its subtlety, nor its imagination (unless it's imagining some bacon or cheesecake in its belly.) Taurus does have a fine understanding of earth, however. It understands the value of a good cut of meat, and the possible mark-up. Taurus also has an eye for practical concerns, like finding a good pimp for protection, buying some sparkly bling to attract menfolk, and learning how to run in heels.

We also would have accepted: Slutty Piece of Food, Slutty Cow

Gemini: Slutty Angel and/or Slutty Devil
What a lot of folks don't get about The Twins is that they can be just as dark as they can light. After all, Gemini's focus on the intellectual leads it not only down the primrose path of accolades and Honor Rolls, but also into the filthiest corners of the internet. Sometimes feathery, sometimes leathery, Gemini doesn't like being told which side of the morality fence to live on, and in fact, they seem to have little control which of their personalities you're going to be talking to. They're cute when they're bipolar.

We also would have accepted: Slutty Famous Writer, Slutty Number Two

Cancer: Slutty Nurse
This one was a bit trickier to allocate, what with Cancer's fixation on the maternal. I don't really know of too many slutty Halloween costumes which are also motherly, though I do see girls rock the fake knocked-up belly sometimes. While nurses are not necessarily maternal, they do deal with people in the same way a mother might deal with a child. They are care-givers, more involved with providing comfort and support than with the actual "fixing" of a patient. And like motherhood, there is a certain amount of noble sacrifice that goes into this profession. After all, how would you like to wipe asses for a living? Intensely Oedipal though it mat be, sexy nurse outfits are a staple of erotica and Halloween.

We also would have accepted: Slutty MILF, Slutty Gardener

Leo: Slutty Movie Star
Leo kind of sort of sometimes likes to be in the limelight. A showman, a consummate actor, and a whore for attention, Leo's costume will tend to gravitate towards figures that are already in the public eye. Any fool can glance at a magazine and know that the ones who hold the masses in their thrall are the ones making entertainment happen. These are those that Leo will likely emulate. They are also likely to assume that identity for the remainder of the eve, and (if you're unlucky) well into the following day. Alternately, these are the assholes who will wear no costume whatsoever and claim that they've gone "as themselves." But you know, as long they dress trampy then it's all copecetic.

We also would have accepted: Slutty Rock Star, Slutty TV Actress

Virgo: Slutty French Maid
The French Maid costume is an old standard. What do I mean by that? Well, I mean, it's hot and all. But it's also kind of boring as far as sexy costumes go, isn't it? The good news it that while Virgo is practical enough to stick with what works, they're also detail-obsessed enough to keep cutting inches off the hem until they think it looks hot enough. The maid fantasy is also pretty Virgo-ish in that it seeks to make the sexy time with the person who does the shit jobs around the house. Money's on the table, Virgo.

We also would have accepted: Slutty Doctor, Slutty Waitress

Libra: Slutty Catholic School Girl
Ohh Libra, so curious and coy. A little seductress with her head in the clouds and a mouth full of half-truths, Libra rocks the sexy school girl image and rocks it well. Wherever the illicit meets the social, we are likely to find Libra, and the schoolyard is usually the first of many playgrounds for her little games. The Catholic school girl is a balancing force in a strict, morally obstinate educational structure. And the only way to introduce balance is to dirty things up a bit.

We also would have accepted: Slutty Robot, Slutty pop culture reference

Scorpio: Slutty Vampire
Some girls dream of taking you home to Mom & Pop, having some puppies, settling down next to a white picket fence. Scorpio girls dream of hypnotizing you and sucking out your life force. And as long as they keep thinking of inventive ways to handle the latter, I'm pretty okay with that. In short, Halloween (when the Sun has just entered Scorpio,) is the time when it's socially acceptable for Scorpio to let its true colors shine. If I can wrangle it, I plan to make like a Harker and get bit this year.

We also would have accepted: Elvira, Morticia, Slutty Serial Murderer

Sagittarius: Slutty Super Hero or Villain
Like Leo, Sagittarius seeks the figures that capture the attention of the public. But let's face it, a movie star is still just a person. If you're gonna play dress-up, much better to associate yourself with a larger-than-life persona to match Sag's own boundless enthusiasm. Nobody does bright, colorful, and over-the-top better than a comic book character. Now, while Sag is the most zealous placement in the zodiac, its zealotry does not necessarily makes it fight for good or for evil. But whichever side it chooses to embrace, it will do so wholeheartedly. And loudly.

We also would have accepted: Slutty Cartoon, Slutty Nun

Capricorn: Slutty Cop
With a mind centered in hierarchy and position in the world, Capricorns are often associated with cold enforcement of the laws of the world. Thus, a law enforcement official is a fine choice for a uniform...err, costume. Capricorn is a control-based sign, and the police woman fantasy is a willing surrender of control, either on the part of the detainee or the officer. Expect the dirty cops of Capricorn to utilize some peace-keeping props (handcuffs, baton, etc) for more efficient acquisition of attention.

We also would have accepted: Slutty Athlete, Slutty Corporate Scum

Aquarius: Slutty Counter Culture
Aquarius is just as concerned with the structure of the world as Capricorn. However, Aquarius seeks to change, refine, improve it – Aquarius is about social change. Unfortunately, the counter cultural groups that are often associated with cultural change can become stagnant repositories for youths looking for an "individual" identity, clinging to the same set of ideals as the rest of their little clique. For good or ill, the girls of goth, punk, the hippie movement, and other such groups are markedly Aquarian. Rather than outfitting themselves around the look of an individual, the Aquarian seeks to model themselves around the imagery of a set of ideas, usually those which are considered against the grain.

We also would have accepted: Slutty Mad Scientist, Slutty Alien

Pisces: Slutty Animal
Pisces exalts the primal. It is a sign which wants to experience all of experience itself, all the way from the height of artistic expression, all the way back to the most base and bestial source of life. Thus, the process of reverting back to animal life. Catgirls, Playboy Bunnies, whatever works for you. A Slutty Mermaid would also be a very true extension of this Piscean reversion back to the source of life – the sea itself.

We also would have accepted: Slutty Poet, Slutty Goddess

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On a personal note, Halloween is Nicky Boom Boom's birthday. So goils, give me the gift of tradition - get out there and dress in as little as you can! Guys, send booze and candy corn.

Copyright 2007, Nerdcore Astrotypes

Avatar & The Four Elements

A brief explanation

I first encountered Nickelodeon's Avatar: The Last Airbender a few years ago while watching Sponge Bob with my niece and nephew. At the time, the show hadn't yet had its debut, so all I saw were a few promotional commercials. I immediately dismissed it as tripe because a) it's on Nickelodeon, and I'm an adult. The days of SNICK are long gone, I'm afraid. and b) it struck me as being shamelessly Pan-Asian. As Asiaphilic as I am, I take great umbrage when producers decide to slap a bunch of clashing motifs together because they seem to convey a cheap Oriental mystique.

However, as internet buzz persisted, and a few of my fellow anime nerds chimed in on the matter, I decided to give it a go. After all, I do watch a lot of cartoons, so playing the adult card is a no-go. And I do like PF Chang's, so I have to give a little slack on the whole Pan-Asian thing.

Point being: I'm glad I decided to watch the show. Not only because it's a quality cartoon in its own right, but because it jibes quite nicely with two of my other areas of nerddom. First off, martial arts nerdery - all the fighting styles in the show are based on real Chinese martial arts. Sweet, I love Chinese Martial Arts. Secondly, I got into Avatar at the same time that I was starting to learn Astrology, the same time that I was exposed to Four Element Theory.

You see, Avatar is a show where fighters have an innate elemental type: Fire, Water, Air, or Earth. And there are four seperate martial arts that were chosen by the show's creators, each allocated to one of the four elements in a way that makes archetypal sense. Exciting!

Super quick synopsis: In our Asian-themed fantasy world, there are four "nations": The Fire Nation, The Earth Kingdom, The Water Tribes, and The Air Nomads. They all lived in relative peace until the Fire nation started doing what fire does – they tried to conquer everything. Now, in times of great duress, The Avatar – the only person capable of wielding all four elemental styles, reincarnated every generation – is supposed to step in and restore balance.

But a freak accident caused Aang (our protagonist, an Airbender, and the current incarnation of The Avatar,) to be trapped in a block of ice for 100 years. Kind of like Captain America. Since he didn't actually die, the avatar was not reborn, and the Fire Nation continued its blitzkrieg unchecked. One day, a couple of Water Tribe kids find Aang, frozen in an iceberg, and help to thaw him out. Now, with their help, he's trying to master the other three elements and save the world from the Fire Nation, who have put a flag down just about everywhere they could.

Also, the kids ride a flying buffalo.

Without further ado, let's do some elemental archetyping!

WATER

Water is yin - negative, feminine. It is dynamic and insubstantial. Dynamic because it can change or destroy the substantial; insubstantial itself because, as Bruce Lee said, "You cannot grasp it or punch it." And yin because it shows no independent expansion - when a droplet of water hits a napkin, it looks as though there is more of it; in truth, it has merely decompressed.

Or, as Mr. Lee was known to expound, "If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water my friend."

Water is indicative of emotional depth and intuition.

The style chosen to convey hydrokinesis is Taiji Quan. (You kids may know it as "THAI CHEE," or hopefully, "Tai Chi.") Taiji is a very appropriate choice indeed, as it utilizes the "water" inherent in the body - the chi, ki, prana, life-force, whatever you want to call it. This martial system's method of power generation deals with complete relaxation of the muscles so that there are no "kinks in the hose" and the chi may flow more freely. In other words, so there are no blockages in the system of waterways within the body.

Water, dealing primarily with the emotional, is notorious for distortion of the truth. True to form, many people don't regard Taiji as a martial art at all, assuming that its only benefit is the elimination of stress and the promotion of internal health. In truth, these are means to an end, and another way of "defending oneself."

Waterbending is modeled after Taiji. The Water Tribe folks' methods of attack are wide and varied, just like the applications of martial Taiji. Most of the time, Katara (the show's main Waterbender - and Aang's teacher for this style, and his love interest) will simply slam an enemy with a tendril of water after having drawn it up from its source; essentially, directing it like a whip. The same theory is prevelant in Taiji, though at a much shorter range.

Taiji is not only a striking art - it can be used to subdue an opponent through joint-locks and throws, and, as most people know, has tremendous benefits to the seasoned practioner's health. Waterbending, again, follows suit. Waterbending can be used to subdue through freezing water into ice, hardening it around an arm, a leg, or the whole frame. Waterbending can also be used to heal injuries, though much more quickly and reliably than real Taiji would be able. It is a cartoon, after all.

This too, speaks of our Hermetic water's yin qualities. Formless and adaptive, water can take any number of diferent approaches to defeating an obstacle, sometimes opting to simply work around the conflict altogether, or to manipulate the water within others through fear and paranoia. However, it is also feminine and nurturing, and needn't be applied martially even in a martial discipline. Healing the wounded, acting as a means of support and growth - these are also irrefutibly connected to water.

The Water Tribe is modeled loosely after the Inuits, a people surrounded by water.

Taiji Applications


A Water Bending AMV (with really weird music.) Interesting approaches to root and neutralization.



EARTH

Earth is also a yin element, though it acts more as a place wherein things are nurtured. It does not actively nurture because it cannot actively do anything. It is not dynamic, but static. It cannot change or destroy, it can only be. If you put a clump of dirt on a napkin, you will only get a dirty napkin. That didn't change the napkin structurally, it just got some earth on it. It is substantial because it embodies substance. Earth is redundant like that.

Earth is concerned with the essentials: food, shelter, health, sex. To this end, Earth tends to favor practicality and routine.



Earth Bending, our geokinesis, is modeled after Hung Gar, a popular Southern style of Kung Fu. If you've seen an old 70's Kung Fu movie, it probably has some Hung Gar guys in it, or practicioners from a close relative of the style. A more modern pop-culture reference would be the dude with the rings on his arms from Kung Fu Hustle.

The allocation of Hung Gar to Earth was, to me, the most troubling of the four. For one thing, Hung Gar itself was modeled after the Chinese Five Elements, linking each of their five elements to an animal style - Tiger/Fire, Snake/Water, Crane/Metal, Dragon/Wood, and Leopard/Earth. This certainly complicates things.

Therefore, let's zoom out and look at Hung Gar superficially - that's the way Earth would want it, after all! Hung Gar employs rigid, rigid, rigid stances. Its ardent practioners are known to be able to squat in a low horse stance for upwards of a full hour. What's more, Hung Gar employs a lot of strength training exercises. Its students are not always slim, but they are always solid. And though there is internal power training in the system, most of the attacks look terse and powerful. Traditional Karate is derived from a Southern Chinese discipline which shares these qualities with Hung Gar.

Just like our powerful-looking Kung Fu style, Earth Benders adopt low, strong, and tense footwork. However, when they stomp into place, they actual manipulate the earth under their feet, usually popping a boulder up so that they can strike it, send it flying towards their opponent. Earth may also be reinforced around an Earth Bender's body in order to ensure a harder strike or a more powerful defense, or around an opponent in order to trap them.

Though Hung Gar is more dynamic than Earth should be...it's something that can't really be helped if an allocation is to be made at all. The fact that it is martial implies dynamism. The fact is though, Hung Gar tends to stay practical, keeping a low center of gravity from which to generate force. There's very little in the way of acrobatics or "risky moves" - any unnecessary flash or glamour is cut. Practicality and not taking risks are very Earthen concerns, indeed.

Earth is yin like Water. It isn't dangerous unless the one who wields it "carves" it into a vicious tool. It is not shapeless like Water is, but it can be sculpted. And just as Water can be used for non-martial purposes, the grunts in the Earth Kingdom tend to use their bending for industry, highlighting Hermetic Earth's need to satisfy a work routine and profit.

Within the Earth Benders is an exception, a character who actually has a martial style all to herself. Toph Bei Fong (the coolest character in the show, and Aang's Earth Bending instructor) is a blind fighter who "sees" through vibrations in the Earth. It's kind of like Daredevil, only she can't see it if it isn't touching the ground.

Anyhow, Toph's Earth Bending is modeled after Southern Praying Mantis Kung Fu. In this way she represents a synthesis between Earth and Water. Her sensitivity to vibrations is Water's intuition acting through Earthen means. Her Scorpionic fighting style is loaded with the potency of "shocking power," so that the substance vs. substance mindset of Earth Bending is now modified, as her strikes are loaded with potency cultivated in the mingling of a source of nourishment (Water) and a vessel for life (Earth.) This is the source of her Uranian striking style. This same potency and intuition eventually leads her to percieve the raw Earth inside of metal, something which the Hung Gar Earthbenders can't do. This makes her the only character in the show that can bend metal.

The Earth Kingdom, the largest country in the show, seems to be mostly modeled after the industrious Chinese, the "foundation" (dur hur hur) of all Kung Fu.

Hung Gar applications. Just picture this with boulders and shit.


Toph pwning everything, set to shitty pop punk. (Sweet roll-over backfist around 1:04.)


Southern Mantis rocks you like a hurricane

FIRE

Fire is yang, male and positive. It is dynamic and substantial. If we put fire on the napkin, we can say bye bye to the napkin and hello to some blackened cinders. We may even synge the dinner table. More than any other element, fire has the power to expand, destroy, and remake in its own image - more fire. In this way, it is both destructive and creative.

Unlike our afforementioned yin elements, Fire needs fuel to survive. It needs to consume another element in order to keep going, which explains the Fire Nation's drive to conquer. It burns up Earth (such as wood or other kindling,) Air (needs oxygen to work, and may ignite when reacting with certain gasses,) or, in rare instances, Water (napalm or similar flammable liquids.)

Fire is all about vision, ambition, will.



Our little pyrokinetic antagonists' fighting style is based on Northern Shaolin Kung Fu, a recent favorite in the public eye, and apparently, the preferred style of the show's martial arts consultant.

A testament to Fire's substantiallity, Northern Shaolin also seems to favor a "meet force with force" approach. Fire wants to overpower anything that is not Fire, and to consume it. However, unlike Earth, Fire is not as concerned with things like strong stances or practicality. Where an Earth-type fighter might focus on the most realistic way to get you on the ground while keeping themselves out of harm's way, a Fire-type fighter might leap at you with a whirlwind kick or something else out of the Street Fighter II playbook.

Northern Shaolin isn't quite like that, but it does employ a number of acrobatic-looking displays. Its footwork looks very similar to Hung Gar at times - but only for an instant - as its dynamic nature has the feet leaping, shifting, shuffling into new positions rapidly. The stances do not look as solid, but they don't have to.

Fire almost always indicates a striking type of fighter, whether it be with feet, hands, head, shoulders, or any extremity available. This is because Fire does not give a crap about Water's need for subtlety, nor for Earth's desire to be practical. Thus, it has no tolerance for namby-pamby joint-locks or throws or take downs or wrestling. Fire wants to destroy by hitting things. Northern Shaolin, from what I know of it, is mostly concerned with striking. Fire Bending certainly is.

Fire also likes to be the center of attention. Northern Shaolin Kung Fu has been one of the most well-known styles inthe world ever since monks figured out that people will pay a lot of money to see them flip around and shit. Thus, a showman is born from this style. Thus, Fire builds a rep for itself.

Given Fire's lack of adaptability, Fire Bending is actually kind of the dullest form, at least from an elemental point of view. Unlike the yin elements, no one ever shapes it into anything cool. It's all just punches with fire, kicks with fire. There's no alternate use for it like Water's healing or Earth's industry - the closest it comes is when a character uses his power to heat up a cup of tea.

The only adaptation it is given is when it takes on the form of lightning. Only the most powerful Fire Benders can generate lightning, which is really just a more intense and focused type of fire. It only ever gets more martial and destructive.

No one is teaching Aang how to Fire Bend yet, as almost all the Fire Benders in the show want to capture or kill him. But the show often splits its focus off from our group of heroes in order to follow the exploits of Prince Zuko, the Aries-esque anti-hero. Though he's the heir to the throne, he's been dishonored and exiled due to an argument with his father. Now he's on a mission to capture The Avatar in order to restore his position.

The Fire Nation seems like it might be modeled after Japan. On the world map, it appears to be a small archipelago that tries to conquer the world. There's also the penchant for conformity and over-the-top displays of vibrancy and raw power.

Some Northen Shaolin Kung Fu


A video dedicated to Zuko, the series' angsty Aries anti-hero. Again, pop punk. These kids and their music.


AIR

Air is yang, insubstantial, static. It is yang because it is as expansive as the breeze, insubstantial because it cannot be grasped or held (only bottled or contained,) and static because it cannot change or destroy the material. If a gust of wind hits our napkin, it'll probably just blow away.

But what about storms, you say? Part of Air's yang nature is its ability to move things...things like the yin elements, Earth (tornadoes,) and Water (Hurricanes.) The Air isn't destroying anything, it's just carrying things, rearranging them. There've been stories about a cow getting picked up by a twister only to be set down unharmed far away from where it left the ground. It was merely Earth rearranged!

Air is most concerned with the intellectual process, curiosity, freedom of thought.



Air is also the natural element of our protagonist, Aang The Avatar. He's the titular "Last Air Bender" because the rest of the Air Nomads were slaughtered by the Fire Nation during his century-long slumber. Fire eats up Air, after all. His aerokinesis is modeled after Baguazhang, a beautiful, menacing, and complex style of Kung Fu.

Air Benders tend to try and use their brains to solve a problem, given to Air's intellectual nature. When force to confront a problem their first response will be to get the hell out of its way. Just like Baguazhang favors circular footwork in order to avoid an opponent's attack and flank them from the rear - it is the smartest place to attack from, after all.

Air is also very curious, and likes to try a bit of everything. Though it never stays very long, it can get into a lot of places and see a lot of things that the substantial elements cannot. As such, Bagua employs striking, throwing, joint-locks, some groundwork, and footwork based on a geometric concept - the circle. Bagua also has an extensive Eastern Hermetic association, as it is rooted not only in elements and animals, but in the triagrams delineated in the divinatory Taoist text, the I-Ching.

And although it calls upon a melange of different fighting concepts, it exclusively utilizes the empty, open-palmed handshape. No fists, no strange looking animal claws or grasping talons, just palms. This handshape is often used to chop in some styles, and is thus known as a "knifehand." Interesting that in our Tarot, Air is represented by another edged weapon, the Sword.

Air Benders use the circular footwork of Bagua, but since many of the battles are long-range, they don't often get to flank their opponent in close quarters..with the exception of a really great fight between Aang and Zuko in Episode 2, where Aang just out outmanuvers him again and again. The footwork is usually used as a windup for a huge blast of Air, or as a means to ride on updraft to float on. The use of Air allows them to do a lot of non-Bagua-ish fantasy things, like running up walls or riding around on a swirling ball of air.

Though it contains strikes and locks, Bagua tends to throw a lot This aligns well with what Air does, and what Air Benders will usually do. After all, Air is an element that rearranges rather than changes. Bagua arranges the opponent's body in a way that makes them eat dirt; Air Benders use gale-force winds to knock people down or deflect incoming threats.

While Water can be used to heal, and Earth can be used for industry, and Fire can be used to...burn things...Air Benders don't really focus on a serious application of their bending. They just use it to play games and have fun, which sounds like par for the Hermetic Air course to me.

Aang was taught to bend Air by the other Air Nomads. They don't seem to be modeled after any particular nationality or ethnicity, but after the Eastern monastic tradition in general. They don't have a specific land of their own, but live high up in the mountains, philosophizing and having fun all the live long day. After all, Sustained Air (code for Aquarius,) is all about the ideal life, the Utopia. Which is all well and good until someone comes along and lights you on fire.

Here is some great Bagua footage that You Tube won't let me embed.

And some more, detailing applications of the form. (And naughty language.)

And one that they will let me embed. I don't think this style suits me martially, but goddamn do I love watching some Bagua.


Finally, Air Bending. Video is repetitive, but I kinda like the song. Besides, Air deserves some rap.


The Avatar State

And finally, a word or two on spirit, or aether.

Some say there is a 5th element. In fact, the Chinese and Japanese each have different systems based on five elements. The Chinese sytem was briefly examined in the Earth section, so for posterity's sake, here are the Japanese elements: Fire, Water, Air, Earth, and Void. Nearly the same as the Greek system, with a single addition.

It turns out that this concept is pretty prevalent. Aristotle included a fifth element, which he called "Aether" in his system of classical elements.

Here's what Wikipedia tells me a bunch of people said: "...the four terrestrial elements were subject to change and moved naturally in straight lines while no change had been observed in the celestial regions and the heavenly bodies moved in circles. In Aristotle's system aether had no qualities (was neither hot, cold, wet, or dry), was incapable of change (with the exception of change of place), and by its nature moved in circles."

In any case, all mention made of this fifth element implies a connection to the divine. According to Webster, our word "quintessential," means "the essence of a thing in its purest and most concentrated form." The word is derived from "quintessence," or "fifth essence." Yes? Yes.

Turns out, Avatar is cool enough to have an allocation for aether, too!

The Avatar is the one who keeps the balance in the world, and the only one who can bend all four material elements. But The Avatar's powers are not limited to bending alone. The Avatar is intimately connected with what the show calls the "Spirit World," a realm for all manner of non-corporeal spirits, whether benefic or malefic. He can use this connection to communicate with his past-life incarnations, all of the Avatars that came before him.

Lastly, he can tap into a well-spring of pure strength in the earthen realm. This is simply known as "The Avatar State." Often not wielding any specific element, The Avatar's eyes glow blue as they are surrounded by a torrent of power. In the beginning, this is something they can only tap into under extreme duress or emotional torrent. But throuh deep meditation (a means to connect to a higher power, or to connect to the purest essence within oneself, or both,) they can control this state at will.

Given that the word "avatar" usually refers to an incarnation of a higher spiritual being, it only makes sense that our hero has easier access than most to this aether.

So even if you aren't particularly religious, the search for aether might show the immense benefits in searching for spiritual purity and exultation. Or, you know, the power to glow blue and go rip-shit crazy. Whatever creams your twinky.

Aether in action?

Copyright 2007, Nerdcore Astrotypes